I miss him. I regret it. I just wanted to hold his hand and wrap him in a hug and keep from saying what I was thinking. I didn't want it to matter. I didn't want to be bothered or to bother him. I just wanted to go back to silly and fun. I wanted to make him laugh. I wanted to feel his arms wrap around me in comfort.
Instead, this horrible silence. His attempt to comfort my concerns with words that fall short. His understanding. His sweetness.
I knew it needed to happen, though. I needed to say what was bothering me. If he is going to know I'm serious about anything, he's going to know I'm serious by seeing me walking away.
But my feelings are still completely with him. If he gives me a reason to, I will walk right back.
I guess this is what a break-up feels like.
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